In this piece, not much will be said outside of the actual points I intend to drive home. The writing will not be lengthy. In fact, it is intended to be one of the shortest writings on this blog. However, this piece is also intended to teach you something that you should not forget in a hurry, or perhaps never forget at all.
First, let’s define the word disappointment. The Cambridge English dictionary defines disappointment as “the unhappiness or discouragement that results when your hopes or expectations have not been satisfied, or someone or something that is not as good as you had hoped or expected.”
Let’s also consider a second definition to consolidate our understanding. Merriam-Webster dictionary defines disappointment to mean “the act or an instance of disappointing: the state or emotion of being disappointed.”
The very liberal definition of disappointment by the above famous dictionaries is indicative that disappointment is an emotional state of being. However, neither of the two sources of definition was restrictive of the causes of disappointment.
They both left the door of causation widely open because disappointment can actually arise through many ways. It could be from actions or inactions of fellow human beings. It could also arise as a result of other variables outside human relationships, such as disappoint in things, situations, weather, etc.
That said, my concern herein is disappointment that arises as a result of human relationships. Therefore, my working definition of disappointment for the purpose of this writing, is simply failure of expectations. I would also further particularise my definition to mean failure of expectations in human relationships.
It is natural to depend on people – friends, colleagues, parents, siblings, neighbours, guardians, pastors, priests, etc. As experience have shown to some of us, it is also almost very natural for people (without exception to the list above) to shock you with doses of disappointments to last you for a life time.
What then is the remedy? How can you avoid disappointment and the pain that comes with it? Your guess is as good as mine is. The wise saying that prevention is better than cure can as well be adapted here to mean that – lack of expectation is better than disappointment. I will explain this further, so be patient.
While it is admitted that no man is an island, it also follows that even islands have survived the ages without aid, but only just by living in harmony with surrounding water bodies. That might sound a bit proverbial, but it simply means people might find greater happiness, peace and improved self-worth by simply avoiding life of dependency, expecting so much from others.
If you take away expectations or dependence in your relationship with men then you will find out that disappointment may lack practical meaning. Without expectations, you will have neither friends nor enemies, but just simply fellow men and women, God’s beautiful creatures. Yes, God’s children, but yet, in whom there will always be found a heart so wicked and full of deceit.
It is in your interest to choose today to live life without the crushing weight of expectation, which we place on others. Yes, we know that people sometimes may or may not willingly let us down. They may also sometimes may or may not even find joy in the pain we suffer in the face of the disappoint from them.
However, there is no way to gauge and accurately determine the innocence of those who disappoint us, but we can afford not to give anyone the pleasure of disappointing us at all. We can live more peaceful when we expect nothing from people.
Pleasant surprise is the reward when you expect nothing. The joy it brings far outweighs the pain disappointment brings. With this knowledge, you will simply move on in life as if you are the only giver – give, expecting nothing in return. Then you may have buried Mr. disappointment.
#Peace.
For more inquiries about the issues raised in this Intel episode or to contact the writer, please leave a comment in the comment section below.
